Most days, if I’m out on the streets of where I live, I see one of my neighbours. He is a wonderful, intelligent and compassionate young man currently beset by all kinds of difficulties. Custody of his son, moving house and problems with his ex-wife. During our very brief conversations he updates me about his current situation, then always asks me how I am. He is infinitely brighter when his young son is with him.
He is in the process of selling his house. He has just changed estate agents. Once the house is sold he can move to where he wants to be, pay off his ex-wife and begin a new life. Anyone who has been involved with the selling of a house knows how uncertain it all is. We feel at the mercy of some unknown buyer. Our fate depends on a “stranger” fulfilling our needs. We can get our hopes up, then only to have them dashed by the stranger’s fickleness or own problematic situation. My neighbour (he is a very resourceful and attractive man) is very lonely (his words), but dare not start a new relationship given the constraints which surround him.
The solution? Simple. Feel The Wish Fulfilled…
So, I would tell him to imagine everything he wants- house sold, ex-wife paid off and reasonable, move into new house, new (non-exploitative or abusive) relationship, continuously happy son. He imagines all this, feels it with every fibre of his being, and all is well. Were he to do this I am convinced it would all happen.
But don’t we all have a problem?
Throughout our whole lives we have been conditioned to react. When we are down and feeling helpless, dredging up optimism is hugely challenging. Being down and helpless invites negativity to the table. When our fears are justified, as they mostly are, the die is cast. The vicious circle continues. Even when we see some light in the gloom, for example someone coming to look at the house, we tell ourselves not to get our hopes up, and we subconsciously entertain the potential buyers as if they are unlikely to be convinced.
How much light do we need to shift our position? To genuinely believe the house will be sold? To entertain the possibility of having, say, six potential buyers amongst whom there is one who will make an acceptable offer? What will it take?
Suppose I go away, knowing my neighbour is in no fit state to accept any amount of optimism, and I feel the wish fulfilled for him?
Is my own life exactly as I want it? Can I invest a large amount of my personal psychic energy into helping my neighbour? Will being of service to him be of service to me? There is no obvious reward for me. None. Or is there?
“It is literally true that you can succeed best and quickest by helping others to succeed.”
Were I to do this, the last thing that would happen (at the present time) will be to go round and tell him what I was up to. So, he sells the house and I announce: “It was me, using the power of feeling the wish fulfilled.” My motivation would be to give him this precious tool; fuelling my ego would be ridiculous. From a life of reactivity, what is the chance that he would believe any of this?
Are you familiar with this (yes, it is true and heavily documented) story?
A therapist in Hawaii was called in to State hospital where the patients were totally out of control. The ward where they kept them was a dangerous place. Staff turnover and sickness levels were very high. People would walk through the ward with their backs against the wall because they were afraid of the patients.
Dr Hew Len, an expert in the spiritual practice, Ho’oponopono, was asked if he could help. He agreed, and worked there for three years. Then the ward was closed because all the patients had been healed. Dr Len never saw any of the patients; all he did and agreed to do was review their files.
While he studied their files, he would work on himself – he would repeat a mantra over and over – and miraculously, gradually all the patients began to heal. After a few months of Dr Len being there, everything changed. Patients could now walk freely; medications were reduced; and some of the worst cases were being released and freed.
Staff began to enjoy coming to work. Absenteeism and turnover disappeared. They ended up having more staff than they needed, because patients were being released and all the staff were showing up to work every day.
Dr Hew Len explained, “I was simply cleaning the part of me that I shared with them…total responsibility for your life, means that everything in your life, simply because it is in your life, is your responsibility. In a literal sense, the entire world is your creation.”
I’ll keep you posted.
Jack Stewart, October 5th 2021. Red October.