Here we go again!
In case you haven’t discovered it, Eckhart Tolle is one of my heroes, an exceptional person, a gift to the world. Because I subscribe to his YouTube channel I get regular updates. A recent offering is Selfless Love and Romantic Transcendence. It is worthy of your attention.
The essence of this, and many similar contributions from other spiritual teachers, is that we should aspire to and ultimately access a state of selfless love, i.e. we love everyone equally. Naturally this is a very tall order, but it has great merit.
If someone is “special” to you and you are “special” to them in an intimate relationship then this might be considered to be of the ego. Your partner is giving something to you that you have not accessed within yourself. And if you watch Eckhart you will see that he suggests such relationships have the potential to fail. Or it might depend on the word “need.” Another term for it is co-dependency.
I haven’t yet worked out how this ties into the concept of symbiosis, of one person complementing the other. Yes we are complete within ourselves, but do we wait until we are in a blissful, “surrender” state before committing, and taking a risk in a conscious relationship?
It is almost becoming a broken record, but the world has no meaning for me unless I can share it with another person. All of nature’s wonders, a sunrise, sunsets, unspoiled beaches, mountains, forests and all kinds of beautiful vistas are enhanced exponentially when experienced with another. The same can be said about music, and art and an appreciation of shared interests.
Tolle is not suggesting it is either or, it isn’t part of his philosophy, and as he has a significant other, it would be the height of hypocrisy.
A meaningful, conscious relationship requires work. If our enemies and people who we disagree with are our greatest teachers, then what value is the contribution from someone who we love, and loves us in return? The world will give you a hundred reasons why you shouldn’t be with someone, why they are “toxic” and you are better off on your own. Maybe you will find a hundred reasons to support the opposite position.
If we are to cultivate a love for humanity then surely, like the journey of 1000 miles, it begins with one other person?
We are currently negotiating our way through a cultural phase in which the list of characteristics which distinguish us and separate us from everyone else is growing by the hour. All the ills of the world can be blamed on another group. And you know where the buck stops.
Compassion, forgiveness, empathy, and understanding are all necessary in an intimate relationship. If it takes us many lifetimes to get to know ourselves, I suspect it takes a little longer to get to know another person.
Wandering round this town (Malvern), it is full of people seemingly eking out some form of existence on their own. It is a kind of self-partnered resting place for ageing hippies.
And we all know there are no coincidences, so despite it being Valentine’s Day a timely email dropped into my inbox:
“With authority, eloquence, and an easy-to-read style, Lipton covers the influence of quantum physics (good vibrations), biochemistry (love potions), and psychology (the conscious and subconscious minds) in creating and sustaining juicy loving relationships. He also asserts that if we use the 50 trillion cells that live harmoniously in every healthy human body as a model, we can create not just honeymoon relationships for couples but also a “super organism” called humanity that can heal our planet.”
Bruce Lipton, The Honeymoon Effect
I cannot recommend Bruce Lipton too highly; I have made reference to his work frequently. I can expand from my own perspective on quantum physics, it is essentially the Law of Attraction, feeling and seeing your wish fulfilled. Not convinced about love potions, but that’s just me, and as for the subconscious mind, bring it on!
No doubt those who appreciate this blog are of a similar mind. The mainstream hammer out a repetitive series of “memes” and “tropes.” I’m not 100% sure what these words mean, and I couldn’t care less, the point has been made. The open minded and awake know what I’m talking about. If you don’t just watch any number of daytime television trash programmes, listen to Radio Gaga (don’t you just love this!) and read the “celebrity” section (most of it) of a tabloid.
Part of being truly awake, so I’m told, is to accept what is and do so with grace. I love the way Eckhart Tolle makes light of everything which grates and satirises the insanity of the world. I’m on my way certainly, but at times a good rant helps.
We all know, and certainly I do from my days as a political activist, that attempting to force your opinion on someone else is a recipe for a wasted life. The only way people like me can justify our actions is the belief that what we are putting over is the truth (excepting the rants) and at some level it resonates with those open to personal, relationship, and planetary change.
And if you don’t want to be the best version of yourself in this incarnation, and you have no interest in attracting and cultivating a conscious loving relationship and the state of the world as it is suits you perfectly, then fine. God bless you.
A good friend of mine has admitted (he is 54) he has never truly been in love. He wants it and is prepared to let go-once he finds out what it is-of the barriers which prevent him from this incredible state. I have no idea whether my situation intensifies his desire for this.
Maybe I am lucky; I know my situation is not common. I cannot and will not express in this post my deep feelings for my beautiful soulmate. I don’t need to and it is not appropriate. When I am inspired, which seems to be pretty often these days, I feel able to express myself in writing to my soul mate in ways which sometimes amaze me. We are all richly blessed, I cannot say that enough. Find your bliss, whatever that means for you, and follow it.
I don’t care either about the commercialisation of Valentine’s Day, any excuse for romantic love and the sharing of it and the expression of it will do me. An oasis on the long journey towards surrender?
Or maybe, the oasis is the place for surrender.
Love to you all, Jack Stewart, Valentine’s Day February 14, 2020.