What do you want?

One of the most powerful tools in NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) is the Outcome Frame. The tool is a series of questions which are based on the premise that you have been healed, or secured what you want and you are there now, in the future, looking back to the present moment. If you read any worthwhile spiritual textbook you will know that operating out of asking for something, as opposed to feelings you already have it, rarely works.

As I slowly but purposefully begin to rebuild my shattered life on a recent walk I ran my answer to the outcome frame questions through my head. What follows may appear to be egotistical but it is the opposite, it is from the heart. Although it’s obvious there is a gap between my current reality and what follows that gap exists only in my mind.

  • What do you want?

To convince as many people as I encounter, through my example, that we are spiritual beings having a human experience. World-renowned healer Harry Edwards wrote in one of his books that this was his first priority. His second priority was to awaken people to the fact that healing (life) is a gift from God and finally his last priority was to heal.

  • How will I know when I have it?

I don’t need to know, I just need to be.

  • If I could have what I want, now, would I take it?

The showstopper question. Commonly known as secondary gain. Hundreds of people have told me over the years what they want and how it will manifest in their three primary senses. Then they are asked if they (really) want it. Any hesitation, any lack of alignment between what they say and how they say it and any feelings I may pick up all point to a part of them that doesn’t want it, doesn’t believe they can have it or even deserve it. From a therapeutic and healing point of view this is where the work begins.

Instantly, I am doing it.

  • What are my personal resources, my strengths?

This question is to elicit the persons strengths and resources-which in most cases they don’t believe they have-but in all cases, it is merely a matter of belief and knowing that:

My resources are infinite.

  • Is there anything stopping me?

The secondary gain question usually points to this. As this was dictated my answer was:

No, nothing.

  • What will be my first step?

A wonderful closing question which enables the person to commit to bringing about the situation which the first question they were asked refers, “What do you want?”

I have taken the first step.

Needless to say this exercise fired me up. But ask anyone who is experiencing grief and they will tell you they can switch from high motivation and being in a very good place to despair in an instant. However having had another massive dip this morning, I found myself coming out of it that bit quicker. I am still committed to the above. Without this, my life has no purpose, no meaning and the darkness that engulfed me would return with a vengeance.

I spent long enough in personal development to know that willpower alone is insufficient to get what you want. If you “fail” it is usually because you have hidden subconscious blocks (secondary gain again) which stop you. And if you can’t commit to a score of 10 out of a maximum 10 then find another goal or get help to discover your blocks. I would give this goal above, for me, 10 out of 10. Do I have any blocks? Of course I do. One is obvious, and others will surface. Am I committed to letting go of the blocks as they arise? Is there any other way?

A number of previous posts, along with this one are all predicated on the fact that the truth resides within us and the “evolution of the soul” is about letting go of all that didn’t serve us in our past lives, destructive cellular memory and present life conditioning, To feel grateful, blessed. To forgive and heal with unconditional love.


Namaste, Jack Stewart September 9, 2019

Here’s an old video (2011) I created, somewhat prophetic. The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step…And God’s house has many mansions.


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